23. The challenges of Bipolar as a Writer #WritersLife

Part of the series “From Zero to Hero – Journey of a Novelist”

Well, I’ll be darned. How long has it been – since the end of the A to Z Challenge, correct? That’s all of May and all of June that I didn’t write a single blog. Or a single word of my manuscript.

I think what happened is a combination of unrealistic goals as a writer, and encroaching problems with my health.

As you have surely guessed from the title, I have Bipolar Disorder, which I always used to call “Manic Depressive.” For those of you who don’t know, it’s relatively simple: 2 poles, 2 extremes – you flip between mania (lots of energy but very anxious and nervous) and depression. Sometimes this flip happens over months, sometimes in a matter of 20 minutes. And there is often no specific trigger which starts the cycles – and no easy or “natural” way to totally control those flips and extremes.

As any of my subscribers know, I can ramble on and on in my blog posts, and certainly the subject of Bipolar Disorder is a gargantuan topic. Suffice it to say I’m just barely controlled enough to be able to hold a full time job of a Programmer, albeit I’m out sick more often than most.

My point in this post is that simultaneously two things happened: I received very good yet very critical editing feedback of my 4 draft chapters, and at the same time I was in the beginning-to-middle of a more prolonged Bipolar episode that I hadn’t recognized, which included symptoms that resembled OCD and phobias. That episode has lasted for months (6 months or more?) and I just this week finally took action to get things under control.

So I stopped writing for months, and almost gave up. But I really do enjoy writing, so I will start again – I’m just not sure when. I’ve already “promised” myself “this weekend” for about 3 weeks now, so we’ll see. I just purchased Nuance Dragon Naturally Speaking 13, so hopefully I can use that as an excuse to get back to it – to something.

Don’t worry, there’s light at the end of the tunnel for me. This isn’t the first time this has happened, and it won’t be the last. I’ll get by, it just may take a little time.




2 thoughts on “23. The challenges of Bipolar as a Writer #WritersLife

  1. Thanks for visiting my blog during the challenge. I’ve been away from blogging since the challenge as well. I’ve been away because of my husband’s illness and hospitalization, but I can certainly empathize with your condition. My step-son suffers from bi-polar along with other mental health issues. It’s a real struggle for him. When he’s on, he’s really on, but when he’s down, he’s down for a while. He’s really artistic and quite a talented musician. It breaks my heart to watch him suffer. I’m glad you’re feeling better. I know my step-son has a love/hate relationship with his meds. He hates the side effects, but without the meds he’s miserable. I wish doctors and scientist could find a cure for mental health issues, but I suppose I should be grateful for the strides they’ve made. I’m told the meds he’s on are 1000 X better than the meds people had to take a decade ago.

    On a good note, I just read your latest post (I couldn’t find a place to leave a comment) and it appears you have quite a few books coming out soon. Congrats on all your hard work and on accomplishing so much. You are leaps and bounds ahead of me.

    I will keep you in my thoughts. Take care.

    Melissa Sugar

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanks so much – again, I was away a long time. My list of books are unfortunately all conceptual. I have the full outlines for only 2 and the rest are just ideas. I’m moving my blog to WordPress.Org soon so look for me there. THANKS


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